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unspoken_goodbyes
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Name: Lara
Country: United States
State: Illinois
Birthday: 2/15/1984
Gender: Female
Interests: i like music and i like jesus...the end.
Expertise: Trying to find a way through this journey called life...
Occupation: Other
Industry: Other
Message: message me
Member Since:
6/4/2003
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| The Lord is a gracious One. Though I have walked my own path so often
lately, He has been good to me, He has answered my prayers, He has
shown me a glimpse of Him. I take hope knowing that He longs to be in
charge of my life. May I find the reliance on Him that I have seen in
him.
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| Two great men, two great problems. Lord lead me down your path of righteousness...cause I am so confused
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| Friends...
Family...
and a new puppy...
...what more could a girl ask for in a weekend? Oh, yeah except for the super fun tubing down the Wisconsin River!!
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| I woke up this morning and found myself in a place, but had no idea how I got there. I have managed to journey down a road that I never wanted to, abandoning all things important to me. Now, I am paying the consequences. It is time to find my way back. But will those things I have lost along the way ever return to me? Someone once said to me, "this too shall pass," but I am not so sure.
Lord, you know my the true desires of my heart. Im trying to let you have control, but I so desperately want. Help me to have peace that you are in control, and will not disappoint me anymore.
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| "Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creature; the old things passed away; behold, new things have come."
Do you really understand what this means? I was in the car early this morning on my way home from the airport, and I was listening to a song by David Crowder, when it hit me that I hadn't really ever understood (and therefore hadn't really ever lived out) the incredible Truth in this verse!
Let me illustrate with an example. There is a person I know and love who is held captive to the past- to past hurt, past reputations, past expectations. At the first sight of vulnerability, the immeadiate response is to go on the defensive, hard core! Life is lived in a constant battle, waiting for things to finally "click." How often I live my life this way. I have heard myself say so many times in the last month, "For the last seven years..." or "Before..." Why is it that as humans we live our lives in the past, always holding on to yesterday? We have a promise from God, a promise that if we are in Christ, all those things have passed away. Not will pass away, or are passing away, but have ALREADY passed away. They are gone and there is no reason in the world why they should still control our lives.
So why do they? Well, if you know me well at all, you wont be surprised at my answer. I say it is becuase we are constatnly questioning Gods power and wisdom. I do not trust that He really is as powerful as He says He is; I do not trust that He really does have a wisdom that is beyond my understanding. Thus, while I do live in the promise of salvation, I hold on to the past for fear that if I let that go I will be lost. And in a way I suppose I am proud of those thigns, because in the worlds eyes my "sexual conquests" are to be bragged about, the focus on me is something to be lifted high.
Reality is, however, that I am lost because I hold on to the past. God is powerful enough, good enough, wise enough to get rid of all the crap- past, present, and future- so that we may step out in freedom and joy. I think that it is not until we are willing to be truly broken and vulnerable for the sake of the cross that we will step into true freedom. And that does not come until we are at a place where we can let go, where we can humbly lay our pride down at the feet of the cross and step away from ourselves so that God can take over. When, willing and waiting or not, we can say, "Even though I want to hold on longer, it is more important to me to step into Your freedom and live wholly for you." It is not an easy task, and it is one that is filled with great sorrow and many trials.But, we are promised that when we "in Christ" the things of our former life have already disappeared and to hold on to them any longer is to deny Christ any room in our lives. No longer do I choose to live that way.
"Come awake from sleep, arise; You were dead, You've come alive; Wake up, wake up, Open your eyes; Climb from your grave, Into the light; Bring us back to life"
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